"IF YOU WANT TO HURT SOMEONE, LIE TO THEM. IF YOU WANT TO TOTALLY SCREW THEM UP, TELL THEM THE TRUTH"







Monday, March 14, 2011

It's Monday...again...

Still in planning faze....

Beginning to think that I have an issue with finishing things that I start.  I have quit every paying job that I have ever had.  Albeit, every one for good reason. Lack of child care, not enough hours to be worthwhile, health reasons.....The only thing I haven't quit that I probably should is smoking.  I think I hold on to that because it is PART of who I am and I like to do it.

I have learned a little bit of many small, mundane jobs.  Waittressing, retail clerk, secretarial assistant.   Even had a short stint as a "bra fitter".  That's right folks, fitting ladies boobs into a good bra.  Small ones, medium and large.  Very, Very Large. 

Of all of these "things" that I've learned the only conclusion that I have come to is that my sole purpose in life is to mother.  The worst thing is knowing how bad I suck at that.  Don't get me wrong, I LOVE my children, but I am too lenient.  No strict boundaries.  The only thing I ask for is respect and it's a little hard to ask for when you don't feel like you've done anything to deserve it. 

I have to have a passion for something.  Narrowing it down with thoughts and writing about what I CAN do, LIKE to do and most importantly, would like to TRY to do.  I have determined this....
I don't have a fucking clue.

But, I do know that I am going to write and I lose myself in my thoughts when I do this....hell, maybe I'm onto something......

Cheers! :)

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